It is so unfortunate that many of us, at some point in our lives, have experienced abusive relationships ourselves, or know someone close to us who went through this torment.
We asked a few people who survived such relationships to give us advice on how to pull through these situations, here’s what they had to say:
1. Walk Away!
Easier said than done but you need to understand that it just isn’t worth it.
“I stayed in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship thinking it will get better, he might change, but 5 years into it, nothing changed. It wasn’t easy but I decided to walk away and never look back- and I’m glad I did. There will always be people who will support you and love you unconditionally, for me it was my best friend “
You do realise that your toxic relationship can effect your children just as bad as it effects you?
“I broke down when I realised that my kids thought it was normal to be abusive, I literally walked away with my kids the next day!”
You keep thinking, this is the day, there won’t be any more abuse, (after all, he did apologise) but it gets worse. He physically abuses you to the point where you can’t take it anymore. Then he apologizes again- do you really want to stay?
“I ended up in the ER- the abuse got so bad. He beat me up because I was wearing a revealing shirt (according to him) My parents supported me and I never went back to him after that.”
4. The Controlling Abuser
You can’t go out, you can’t meet your friends, you can’t meet your family, you have to get your phone constantly checked, the list is endless. Its not just the physical abuse its also the emotional and mental abuse that counts. Don’t let the abuser control your life.
” I used to think that he loves me that’s his way of showing it- then there came a day where I literally couldn’t even speak to my father without being on the loudspeaker. I didn’t have friends anymore and my family had given up on me. It took me a while but I broke up with him.”
5. Confide in someone close
Make sure you have a good support system and your family or friends know what’s going on behind closed doors.
“I’m so glad I confided in my best friend, not only was she there for me but she also helped me get out of the mess. My boyfriend completely denied everything but there was no reason for me to go back to him.”